Monday, September 30, 2002

One wonders that the pinky toe has not yet evolved away. Presumably it offers some balance, but Yours Truly is forever knocking hers against walls, or dart ledges, or having bits of crockery dropped on them. Really, I think I'd be better off without them.

Not a banner day in the Woolie household today. The children have managed to: pour milk on the floor, empty a full box of cereal, empty out the diaper pail(!), spill a mug of tea on the floor (cold, fortunately), tangle up my newly-dyed yarn, rip out some of the Zippy baby sweater, empty a package of wipes all over their room, put throw pillows over the spilled tea, and, not least of their offenses, flood the upstairs bathroom. And this is while I am supervising them, or at least trying to. Lunch had to be watched carefully, lest it boil over-I think sometimes they say they are hungry as a distraction. Obviously these are not my children; they were switched at birth and really belong to a family of manic-depressive monkeys.
It helps to think my life is taking place aboard the Heart of Gold. Improbability figures highly here.

I read "THEY" think french fries might cause cancer. There goes a life worth living!

In the words of Garp, we are all terminal cases.

Sunday, September 29, 2002

A nice, relaxing day today. We took the two little ones to the aquarium and I even managed to knit most of the way through. Kind P-man ran all over after Alice, though. Last night I got the front and back pieces of the tunic finished and put together, as well as starting a sleeve. I had made one already, but I don't like the placement of the increases, so it's going. Is there a trick to increasing in moss-stitch pattern?
I dyed my first skein of yarn with Koolaid tonight! The first attempt didn't go so well, as I forgot that the big containers of Koolaid powder already have the sugar in. Oops. However, Black Cherry turned my wool a nice shade of red and tomorrow I will go back to the market and take advantage of the 8-for-$2 sale. This wool needs to be a nice felted bag, maybe a hobo style but with an extra-long strap to wear it across my body.
I'm starting a hat for stylish P-man or maybe my brother, but I'm not quite finding the right needle size and thickness of yarn, etc., so I need to mess around with it a little till I find what works. I guess knitting is an apt hobby for me since I normally feel the urge to wrap my loved ones in wool before they go out in the world, and this is the best way to do it, I suppose.
Today at the aquarium all the river otters came right up to Alice, from behind the glass, and started doing flips and swirls and generally showing off for her benefit. She was duly amazed, (they were amazing) it was sort of like a friendly wave from the universe. No wonder they are dear P-man's favorite animals.

Saturday, September 28, 2002

A grand time was had by all at the Borders North knitting meeting. All four of us. It was a small, intimate gathering...at which I plugged Knitty with my whole blessed little heart. The ladies were especially thrilled with the Vegan Fox stole...the word is spreading out here! AND I knitted one whole skein's worth of Teddy's scarf on my ever-so-hip plastic Kmart circs. I would have had to switch to my backup project, the zippy baby sweater, if it weren't for my milk leaking and having to get home to feed the baby. Such is the life of a wooliemama! I finally picked up a copy of Interweave, based in our very own Loveland, CO, and I am in love with so many things. Just have to wait for my measurements to even out and I can finally start supplementing my own wardrobe. I love the Bed Coziness that Kate is working on, too. Now if the Stash Fairy would just drop a load of high-end cashmere into the mail slot...

Friday, September 27, 2002

Friday Five

1. What are your favorite ways to relax and unwind?
Knitting, of course! I also read a lot and watch a lot of TV. I know you aren't supposed to say that but it is replacing an actual social life while the kiddos are young. I find it wonderful to get out of the house with no babies but it doesn't happen often enough.

2. What do you do the moment you get home from work/school/errands?
Check my voice mail, usually, to see if any interesting news has come my way.

3. What are your favorite aromatherapeutic smells?
Lavender is my absolute favorite, I use it on the sheets, in the kids' bath, I find it very calming. I like vanilla, too.

4. Do you feel more relaxed with a group of friends or hanging out by yourself?
It depends on what kind of relaxation I'm going for. For blowing-off-steam relaxation, I love to out dancing or to the bar with a group of friends. For everyday recharge, I like to be alone, knitting, reading or whatever. It just helps to have a few silent hours when no one is questioning me or interrupting me.

5. What is something that you feel is relaxing but most people don't?
Housework, up to a point, of course. And knitting-nobody in my usual acquaintance knits and they all think it must be enormously difficult and challenging. I encourage that.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming...
I've been trying to make some winter hats for the kiddos from some Snowflake, the really thin stuff, and not having much luck. I can't seem to find a needle size to please me. The saleslady told me it was sort of difficult to work with, since you can't see the stitches well, but she said this after I paid for it and I was ashamed to change my mind. Feh. If I can ever get them going, though, they'll be marvelous. My new theory is to start all the projects I can, and through steady rotation, they will get done sooner. I have a project to take with me to my brother's football games ( a scarf in Classic Elite Believe done all in garter stitch, sideways), a computer project (second SARK sock), an upstairs project (moss stitch tunic), a downstairs project (back-zip sweater) and I want to throw my Christmas knitting in there, too.

Projects I want to finish before Christmas:
SARK socks, pine-tree socks in plum-colored Wildfoote, socks in a mystery pool-blue synthetic-y mohair stuff that feels just like cotton candy. (I figure the polyester? in the yarn will help it wear better, and they'll be sitting-around socks, not wearing-to-work socks, anyway.)
Hat for P-man and hat for my brother in lovely green Salsa.
Yellow boucle sweater for Isabel
Hats for the girls
Assorted mittens
Variety of Barbie clothes for Isabel (Yes, the dreaded anti-feminist damsel has invaded our home and now reigns supreme.)

Santa will have rope burns on her hands, this year. Also, the kids and I have been brushing up on our Christmas carols, you can never start too early! In our house the season begins November 1, when DMX starts playing holiday music. I'm a bit of a sucker for holidays.

Thursday, September 26, 2002

Welcome and felicitations to two new people who came into the world today, Rachel, Tentatively and Baby T. May you have a wonderful ride.

Amy B. is my prom date! Anyone who offers to watch my babies has my undying gratitude.

Wednesday, September 25, 2002

Yay! (Again) I finished the blue-striped sweater! It looks pretty good, but not so great I am tempted to keep it. I am much happier with my current love, knitted basically all in one piece with no color changes. I will have to sew a zipper in, but I'll worry about that when I get there. Fall is definitely in the air out here and it makes me feel like rolling in a big pile of wool, a la leaves. Of course, it's supposed to snow on Thursday, which will put a damper on my autumnal reverie, but it's nice while it lasts.

My new motto is: Do one dish every day that scares you.

Tuesday, September 24, 2002

Yay! Alice has kicked the paci habit! She has been paci-free for 3 whole days!

And there was much rejoicing throughout the land.

I don't think I am remotely intelligent enough, interesting enough or well enough to be writing about my daily activities. nobody's doll is so good that I am getting pretty depressed about my life. (P.S. same link as below!)

Monday, September 23, 2002

Oh, and Brea, if you visit, leave a damn comment so I don't feel so much like the girl no one wants to dance with.

36. I hate yoga. It's a fine idea, just don't make me actually do it. I am a very tense person and the one time I tried it I thought, "If I have to sit here for 30 minutes and concentrate on breathing there had damn well better be a cigarette in my mouth." Tip: don't show up to your first yoga class with a Big Mac and fries.
37. I love cheesy teen high-school movies. Can't Hardly Wait is one I haven't seen in a while-I heard they cut out a whole character, "drunk crying girl," so as not to seem to approve of teen drinking, but that was a mistake because that girl was at pretty much every party I ever went to in high school.
38. I love fondue.
39. My husband and I love to watch and make fun of stupid game shows. Street Smarts is especially good when we're feeling cranky.
40. My husband and I both say "we" much more than "I." We like so many of the same things and have so many of the same thoughts, as well as reading each other's minds so frequently, that it's a phrase we say with much assurance.

Isn't it amazing how the universe just provides? Now that my first pair of socks is nearly done, all these socky things are appearing in my house. I won a skein of Opal yarn from my local knit list (lately I am just the winningest darn thing-I won the door prize at the last preschool meeting, too!) in Bronco blue and orange that will make a nice pair of socks for my brother-in-law. Can you make a pair of men's socks from one skein of Opal or will I have to get creative? I finished one sleeve of the blue-striped baby sweater, grudgingly. I swear, I am so fickle, one week I absolutely love a project and the next week I can't stand to look at it. This is A) a sad reflection on my character, B) only because I don't have all day with nothing to do but knit like I should, or C) the way everyone feels because there are always new projects to start! Eyes on your own paper, please.

Last night, I found a new (to me) blog that nearly made me cry. I want this woman's life. (Brea, check it out. She's your prom date.) If I could choose, this would be the reality alternate to the one I experience. Although lately, almost any other experience would be fine. The phrase burnt out does leap to mind. I am as surprised as anyone that this is my life.

Sunday, September 22, 2002

Oh my sweet heaven, I've lost another one. Another long post out there with Jimmy Hoffa and Tinkerbell. I am still knitting and my kids are still alive and I still need to stop posting late at night when my typing sucks. I promise I will do this again tomorrow when my wits are about me. If you need me, I'll be banging my head against a wall.

Saturday, September 21, 2002

Friday Five (Finally!)

1. Would you say that you're good at keeping in touch with people?
Not really. I tend to get caught up in my own doings, lose touch, and do the whole catching-up thing later. I wish I was better but hey, I can hardly handle the dishes anymore.

2. Which communication method do you usually prefer/use: e-mail, telephone, snail mail, blog comments, or meeting in person? Why?
Different things for different people. I prefer to talk to my best friend and my husband face-to-face, although I talk to my husband at least twice a day via phone when he's at work. I like to talk to my mom on the phone because then she's more focused. I am really liking making friends on the internet, I think it's less now about being your fantasy online and more about introducing more people to who you really are.

3. Do you have an instant messenger program? How many? Why/why not? How often do you use it?

4. Do most of your close friends live nearby or far away?
My one really good friend lives reasonably close, although not next door, like I'd like. Most of my other friendships are determined by proximity. If I didn't see them at school or the playground, I don't know if I'd be able to keep up.

5. Are you an "out of sight, out of mind" person, or do you believe that "distance makes the heart grow fonder"?
Depends on the person. Some people you never quit thinking about no matter how many miles or years separate you.

In other news...
I am nearly finished with the foot of my second sock, shaped the first shoulder of Alice's tunic and tried the 3-needle BO for the first time. I would never sew another seam for as long as I live if I didn't have to. I finished the ribbing on the blue-striped baby sweater (just sleeves left to do) and cast on for a hooded zip-up-the-back baby sweater using that light blue cotton I got at ARC. I am really really digging it-it's all thick ribbing so far and it feels so plush. I wish I could post some in-progress pictures but neither digital camera nor scanner have we. (And forget about bandwidth.) So you'll have to keep tuning in for my rapier wit and piercing observations.

It was a very wonderful day, by the way. Isabel, Teddy and I watched my brother's JV football team get trounced, but he looks awfully cute in uniform, if I'm allowed to say that about my kid brother. We also visited a fire truck and went to the playground. It was Taco Night and it's Eighties Weekend on VH1 Classics (I highly recommend.)Doesn't get any better than that.

Oh, and I found out I actually am from Uranus!

Hot damn! I am so pissed. Not only have I lost my post several times, but I posted to Friday Five under the name "wookiemama," which is pretty much the opposite of the image I was going for. I had my first lovely long pithy post disappear into the ether, and I think I will just try again tomorrow. If I still keep messing up then, I will have a few beers and give it another go.

My typing is so bad tonight I might as well be doing it with a stick clamped between my teeth. If I hadn't edited this extensively before publishing, it would have looked like I was writing in Welsh, I swear it.

Wednesday, September 18, 2002

Time for a little audience participation...

Why do they call it frogging?

Would it really kill craft stores like Michael's to stock non-acrylic yarns? Do they really believe that people who insist on 60 shades of craft paint and an entire aisle of bridal ribbon deserve only acrylic yarn for their knitting needs?

What moron decided to give Billy Ray Cyrus a TV show? Playing an MD, no less. (I heard it on the radio. We don't watch PAX for religious reasons.)

So Isabel's preschool is making a quilt and every family gets to decorate a square with a letter or number. Our letter is "T" and I think it will be really cute. Isabel stamped oak leaves over a T-shaped trunk, and later I will sew on assorted "T" buttons. We have a turtle, a truck, a 3, a tyrannosaurus rex, etc. Get it? It's a T-tree!

I think I have finally found my niche.

Over here it is the Night of a Thousand Dropped Stitches. (Bet that would sound really badass in German) I have a new project, a felted tote bag made out of the oh-so-au-naturel wool I picked up at the thrift store. Question-would you Koolaid-dye it before or after knitting? or before or after felting? Nobody I know wants a carryall in dirty-sheep-butt cream, and since I'm irreversibly brunette and missed out on the whole dying-your-hair-with-Koolaid trend, you know I am just dying to tint everything Black Cherry. (No pun intended.)

Wow. I've been a little punctuation-mad this evening. Watch out, I have a hyphen and I don't know how to use it!(They are so dangerous in the wrong hands.)

When is the Wayne's World revival? I cannot wait for the nostalgic return of "Schwing!" and "Not!"

Schwing is actually pretty perfect, linguistically speaking. It's complimentary without being demeaning, and sexual without being overtly crude. It translates well to expressing excitement of a general nature, and is vague enough that parents (my parents, anyway) don't get it right away. I remember being so impressed after the movie came out and my dad dug out his dusty 45 of "Bohemian Rhapsody."

Party on, Garth.

Tuesday, September 17, 2002

Been working on the moss-stitch tunic tonight, blech. I am so tired of it, and then I will get to see it for another six years or so because it's enormous and my kids will never grow out of it. Started second sock and very proud of myself. Also starting to get parent packets together for our fundraiser, Steele-A-Deal (no, I didn't name it that) henceforth known as SAD. Last year I was fundraising "co-chair" and it was a joke. The mom I was working with just drove me up the wall. No delegation skills, control freak, it was so bad I almost didn't send Isabel back there this year and forget being able to talk to anyone about it and sound like I'm bad-mouthing her. Of course, I am now, but she was so awful my ex-husband even felt bad for me. She was actually nice, just a horrible boss. I've had friends with kids who are brats before, but I never thought I would dig the kids totally and want to hide from the parents. So of course last year things went sort of terrible and I had to volunteer to do it this year so I could show everyone I can do it right. I'm also trying to gouge enrollment paperwork out of parents, since D. is on vacation, and I suck at it. I have very little authority. I mean, really, all the other moms have shoes older than me and they know it and I know it. Plus they've only known me pregnant, when I'm utterly brain-damaged. I'm sort of like a trick monkey there, I talk to all the kids, I knit and do little projects like felt fortune-cookie valentines, watch everyone's kiddos on the playground, and miraculously have great babes myself. I'm the idiot-savant of the preschool.

Of course, I have 4 more years not counting this one and I live down the street. I will be chairwoman of the board when they are all paying dues in the PTA.

Just depends on the size of your pond.

Obviously I'm feeling a little aggrieved tonight. Better skip to my "X number of things" and try again tomorrow.
24. The "diamond" in my engagement ring is actually CZ. My dreamy P-man had a little cash flow issue-he needed the money to buy me a house. He proposed on the porch the day we got our keys. (I'm telling you, they don't come any better than him.) Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, real estate is. A man who knows this is a keeper.
25. We are technically not married yet, and poor Teddy was born out of wedlock. Which is better than poor Alice, who was born while I was technically(cannot stress that enough) still married to Isabel's dad. Which was better than poor Isabel, whose dad I married because I "had to."
26. The above notwithstanding, we are actually the most traditional and happiest family I know (the two qualities are neither mutually in- or exclusive) and the kids are all doing great. It means they have 3 sets of grandparents and get more Christmas presents than seems reasonable.
27. I was born January 20, 1979.
28. I was due in December of 1978, so my mom gets to tell people I was a "year" late.
29. I am always late to everything, even now. If I'm early I start to panic I'm in the wrong place, or have the wrong time or something.
30. I'm late because things always happen to me. I have epic car trouble or need to find an animal shelter on Thanksgiving (don't ask) or other really random stuff.
31. For my 17th birthday I threw a small party for myself. A friend of a friend made flyers...I ended up taking my boyfriend to the ER later, he needed stitches in his scalp and his jaw was broken in two places. A few years later I met a girl who didn't even live in the same city as I did but who had been to my party. That kind of thing happens to me a lot.
32. That was the same boyfriend who lit himself on fire once. Accidentally. It was hilarious. (No boyfriends were harmed in the making of this anecdote...)
33. I am socially inept. I end up getting really nervous and laughing after everything I say.
34. I hate to answer the phone.
35. I lie a lot. Not really in a pathological way, though. I lie when the real story is too complicated to explain (happens a lot), to avoid hurting someone's feelings, to avoid confrontation with my mom (unwinnable) and once in a blue moon to my kids. Almost always I tell them the truth, though. I told the truth about WTC and birth and little girls being kidnapped and my daughter usually is fine. I try to be honest about big stuff. I told her I was a queen, though, and that's why I have a tiara in the closet. I never lie to my P-man.

Normally my body tells me what I am hungry for and in this way I eat a balanced diet. Unfortunately all my body seems to want tonight are many Fun-Size Snickers.

Monday, September 16, 2002

Score! Went to ARC today and bought 6 or 7 bags of yarn for 23 bucks. Not all of it is great stuff, some of it is generic acrylic I'll use to make mittens for the kids, but I did get 6 skeins of Red Heart cotton (?) in a pretty baby blue and a whole bunch of plain old cream wool which I will use to experiment with felting. I finished my sock late last night, too. Also, I went to Old Navy to use a gift card that some in-laws sent as a baby gift and bought an unreal amount of stuff for $100. Viva la clearance rack! I got something for everyone in the family, including a fab brown suede purse to replace the one that Alice scribbled with lipstick. I'm glad I got a lot of stuff, 'cause I'm sure the people who work there aren't eager to see my little family anytime soon. Between Isabel trying to climb all the clothing racks and me hogging the handicapped dressing room to nurse and change diapers, I bet they were glad to see the back of us! The only thing more exhausting than trying to shop with little kids in tow is actually birthing them. Maybe teaching them to drive, but I'm not there yet. Like Utah Phillips says, the lights in those places make kids crazy. Although if it's anything like we feel when we have to sit in those tiny chairs in the preschool, I understand.

Discount-shopping mamas unite!

Only one or two things about me tonight:

21. Animals love me. It's probably because I've been a nursing mama for most of my adult life and I smell like a buffet to them.
22. I won a costume contest when I was about 7 or so, dressed in a giant Toto costume made out of tulle and wire. It was one of the most embarrassing moments of my childhood. (And there were many. Meet my mom, and you'll understand.)
23. I drink an enormous amount of Diet Coke every day. If my supply is interrupted, I am incapacitated. Go ahead, I know, it rots your teeth, too much caffeine, etc., etc., I've heard it before, but I say whatever gets you out of bed in the morning and this does for me. And it's still cheaper than crack.

Sunday, September 15, 2002

Cleaning Day! One of the most half-hearted attempts P-man and I have made in a while. We called it quits around 6 and watched Almost Famous instead of going to the grocery store. Alice absolutely loved it, she sat and watched pretty much the whole thing, quite a feat for a 20-month-old and practically unheard of for an unanimated movie. Maybe it's 'cause I saw it in the theater while she was in utero. I am at about the first cm of ribbing on my sock, and got a little end-weaving in on a baby sweater and Teddy's baby blanket.

Livin' the dream, baby.

Saturday, September 14, 2002

Came home from preschool picnic and fell helplessly asleep for 6 hours. I did not mean to leave wonderful P-man on his own with the little ones but even when I tried to wake up I could not. It sounds like heaven but I woke up confused and completely out of it, having dreamt some weird nonsense about cleaning out my dead grandma's basement. We humans are a funny group. I did get to work on my sock, now that the heel is done! My friend Amy's husband Rafael was making fun of me for spending a week working on something I could have bought for half the cost. I told him I believed in knitting as a revolutionary act. I invited his daughter (Isabel's favorite friend) to spend the night next weekend, when I will continue preparing the girls for the revolution by painting each of their nails a different color and disparaging Disney movies. I sat and talked to a new family for a while, and when I got home there was a message from the husband saying they had looked for a Gwyn but couldn't find me. There was a program on Art Bell about invisibility-maybe it's happened to me!

If I were invisible I would never have to speak in public again.

As if I didn't write enough, I forgot it was Friday.

Friday Five:

1. What was you favorite subject in school? Why?

English. As if you couldn't tell, I love to write and occasionally excel at it. I used to get in trouble for "reading ahead." If you don't remember what that means, good. Perhaps this barbaric custom will die with us.

2. Who was your favorite teacher? Why?

This is a tie. Weiss was my high school english teacher four times. That is, I took his class four times and never passed it. That having been said, we adored each other, and he has been known to change curriculum based on ideas of mine. He still reads papers of mine aloud in his classes and once told me I was the most right-brained person he'd ever met. His was the class the other kids all tried to get out of 'cause he was such a hardass.I don't feel like I'm bragging, it's just when a teacher who has taught thousands of students in his career takes a special interest, well, I'm simply very proud of his faith in me. My other favorite was Mags, my Latin teacher. She is the funniest, most intelligent, together woman, she has these wonderful grown kids who are exactly who I hope my kids turn out to be like, and she has this facinating life where she has friends in every country and globetrots often to visit them all. She speaks something like 7 languages, has the sharpest sense of humor I've ever seen, and takes absolutely no shit from anyone. I wish she was my mother.

3. What is your favorite memory of school?

I wrote a poem once that got high, high praise from a teacher I greatly respected. I only told a few people but I've always held my head a little higher when I think of her.

4. What was your favorite recess game.


5. What did you hate most about school?

Having to spend nine hours a day waiting for other kids to finish tests or ask questions, doing worksheets, studying things that were only incidentally useful, having a teacher I hated. It seemed like for every hour of school, you got about five minutes of learning and the rest was busywork.

Obviously this sock was sent to me as some sort of karmic lesson. I finished the heel today, and finer a heel was never seen, until I realized it was at a right angle to the toe. The pattern I am following is, shall we say, counterintuitive. But the heel is done now, giving me more psychic space to contemplate my feelings on starting the second one.

My best friend took me out to dinner so we could speculate on her boyfriend's motives for his latest of dirty deeds. Rene, on the off chance you're reading this, I am so on to you, you are not fooling anyone. And I am too ladylike to even comment about Beth.

Gift idea: maybe a nice crochet leash to keep her errant beau in line?

11. I love to sleep with talk radio on.
12. I recently located my father, who I haven't seen since I was an infant. I haven't contacted him yet, though, since I can't think of anything I want to ask him.
13. I am secretly a sucker for astrology, tarot, personality quizzes-anything that promises to tell me something about myself I didn't know. (Well, humans are all basically narcissists...)
14. My children were born in the years of the Tiger, the Dragon, and the Horse. A house where a Tiger lives will supposedly be immune to theft and fire, the Dragon is the luckiest and most powerful of the signs, and Horse is my own sign, so we are doing rather well in that respect.
15. I cannot, cannot, cannot stand Paige on Trading Spaces. Hopefully one day someone will wallpaper over her.
16. I have the best husband in the world. (He is a very busy little breadwinner and highly unlikely to be reading this so I'm not saying this for brownie points.)
17. I think dieting is evil and should be abolished immediately. Anne Lamott and I agree, people just need to be soft and clean.
18. I am what they used to call a "yellow-dog " Democrat. I probably wouldn't post that here or anywhere, it's not especially relevant, but I love the phrase so much I am tempted to walk around saying I'm a yellow-dog feminist or a yellow-dog bill-payer and sounding completely mental, so it's best I get it out of my system here, don't you agree?
19. My favorite movie (right now) is Wonder Boys. I could just watch it over and over again, and I don't really know why. Watching a movie repeatedly is out of character for me.
20. My all-time favorite first line in a novel is the opening sentence of Rebecca. ("Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley...") I like it because a story could go simply anywhere from there.

Those who know me my have noticed that I am not using the same sort of emphasis I usually employ for both the written and spoken word. My bold and italic buttons appear to have gone on hiatus. Read all of the above as if being spoken by a short person with a flair for hyperbole.

Thursday, September 12, 2002

I just have to say how much I adore the online diary format. I have never wanted to be famous (I like my privacy) or rich (I would be thrilled with "comfortable" or even "not one month away from not being able to make the mortgage") but I have always wanted to air my opinions to the world. I fantasize about answering the Proust questionnaire in the back of Vanity Fair, or being on Inside the Actor's Studio. I really don't want to be an actress or even a minor celebrity-I just want people to listen to me. To this end, I will commence a list of one hundred facts about me, at the rate of however many I think of a day. I might not stop at 100, either. Maybe it's time I remind myself of some of the stuff I like about me.

1. I never really wanted to have kids until I had them.
2. At least one of my children owes their life to Jeff Buckley.
3. I learned to drive stick-shift at 19 and I am still very proud because that was one thing I thought I couldn't learn.
4. I love to stay up late-a night job would be perfect for me.
5. I hardly wear any jewelry (except for The Ring) but when I do, I never, ever wear gold.
6. There is a very specific reason for this that I am not going to tell.
7. My earliest memory is from age 18 mos. I ate some tulips in my grandmother's yard.
8. My husband only half-believes this. He thinks it happened, just when I was older and more capable of remembering. He is wrong.
9. I love ketchup, spaghetti sauce, sundried tomatoes-almost every version of tomato except raw, which I can't stand.
10. I have extremely small hands.

Coming Soon: Gwyn answers the Proust Questionnaire!

In other news: the heel of my sock is almost done. I had to rip it out two or three times last night, until I realized my extreme fatigue was the reason I kept messing it up. After 4 or 5 rows, it will be all leg-easy street. Then I can start the other sock. Not as exciting as say, winning the lottery, but it will be my first complete pair! I really need to start finishing up my WIP's, as I need to get started on Christmas/winter stuff. If we don't get our home equity loan this fall, it will be an Imagination Christmas so I at least want to have some lovely wooly things to ease my mind. Of course that is ridiculous-I would sell my body to make sure there are sparkly gifts and crap plastic toys under the tree for my kids (not because of my love of capitalism but because of happy memories and my theories on the nature of time...another day.) Hopefully I will use up a bunch of my stash and get LYS gift certificates under my tree!

At some point I assume I will begin to feel like an adult instead of a really, really cranky teenager.

I think I am going to run out of yarn before I finish Alice's tunic. I bought enough for the pattern, my gauge is spot-on, but I think the problem is that it is designed to be huge. Apparently there are tunics and then there are tunics. She'll probably have to belt it! Somehow I doubt the one-sleeved tunic will be high fashion among the toddling set. Alice tends to be a bit accident-prone, (she learned running and walking at the same time) and her elbows need all the protection they can get.

By the way, Mamakate, you are my new superhero. Having a message from you is like getting mail from a celebrity! Your kids are adorable. I took the liberty of reading your archives while trying to puzzle out my sock, and I think you are a rock star.

Wednesday, September 11, 2002

A few words to you ad wizards and professional pundits out there:

Enough. Just stop, okay? I remember the shock and the fear and the horror of that day like it was yesterday. I don't need photos to picture streams of people stumbling over New York's bridges, covered in ashes, looking like refugees and holding on to one another for comfort. I can still see the numb, stunned expression that formed on George W.'s face as an aide whispered in his ear in a grade school classroom. I sure as hell don't need tacky commemmorative glass towers or self-planting gardens in the shape of flags. The uncertainty has stayed with me, the rumors of biological warfare, dirty bombs. I heard someone on TV that day estimate that there should be 10-15 thousand people in the towers. I saw Peter Jennings, shirtsleeves rolled up, trying to comfort a frantic pregnant woman who had called the station looking for her husband, a Cantor Fitzgerald employee. I thought, for the first time, that maybe bringing children into this world was a foolish, cruel thing to do. I can do without the video montages set to patriotic music. Since then, I have not felt safe. I have been nicer to strangers.

So I took my kids to McDonald's for breakfast, and then to music class. I quietly wiped up the syrup that Isabel spilled on the snack table. We spent hours at the playground, me knitting leisurely while they put sand in each other's hair, and I let them play with the neighbor's dog instead of rushing them into a much-needed bath. I even shared my secret stash of licorice. I know on TV there will be a thousand memorial programs, 9/11 stories, 9/11 babies, but we won't watch them.

I will never, ever forget that day. I don't need any of your damn reminders.

Tuesday, September 10, 2002

There's no accounting for taste. This morning Alice pooped on Isabel's wedding-dress-clad Barbie. Obviously, she is a woman of strong opinions.

An afternoon at the preschool has left me wiped out. I have just enough time to feed the kids dinner and head back there for the board meeting. I am assistant enrollment chairperson and also fundraising chair (2nd year in a row! I am crazy.) and rather than feeling indispensable, I feel like someone's annoying kid sister, always hanging around and asking questions. The fact that I'm about a decade younger than everyone doesn't help. If I ever get a tattoo it should probably read "oddball." I am debating whether or not to knit at the meeting. I have discovered that, on some projects at least, I can knit without even looking, but I don't know how others will feel. I wonder if anyone would take it as a sign of boredom or disrespect. It's not, though. If I am limited to 24 hours in a day I need to get as much use out of every second possible. I have even knitted at a bar while waiting for my friend to get back from the bathroom. The idea of two hours wasted (from a knitting perspective) makes me a little crazy.

Monday, September 09, 2002

Oh, my darling P-man (P is for pikaman the perfect pseudotech.)He is the wonderful one who understands many things computer-y and installed little magic buttons for me, as well as a little smiley to broadcast my every emotion. I have not had to trouble my pretty little head over any of this! If all men were in danger of being massacred by hordes of angry women, my P-man would be the one the men would choose to act as emissary to placate the ravening amazons. He could be the representative of the male species. I am not making this up. He mops the floors every weekend, never ever pretends to be asleep when a baby cries (actually he sometimes is halfway across the house before I can even untangle myself from my nursing bra) and brings me Milky Ways on his way home from work. He even wears the slightly awful sweater I made him, proudly. My Grandma would have called him a Catch.

I think I have this sock thing licked! If the pair goes as quickly as I hope, Santa will be stuffing many stockings into stockings this year!

It's raining, raining, raining, here. I love it-makes me homesick for Seattle. Finally, knitting weather. I am tired of heat so extreme it belongs in a Vin Diesel movie. The fabled Rocky Mountain High mostly brings me low. Can you believe the natives here refer to aspens turning yellow as "fall foliage?" Perhaps on Three-Mile Island.

Also, hello to Best Friend Brea, (someone actually visited before you! Who would have known?) For those of you who don't know, she is the John Lennon of best friends. There are so many stories in this woman! She was actually at the birth of two of my kids, which can be quite a feat at a C-section. During the last one, we realized at nearly the exact same time that "Hotel California" was playing on the Muzak. The odd part was that previously neither of us had realized there was any music, and we had been in that room for at least 30 minutes, which sort of explains what kind of a day that was. Good luck for Brenda, the only person I know hoping for a positive result on a home pregnancy test.

Tomorrow is my aide day at the preschool. That should be good for at least one unbearably cute anecdote.

I think the socks are finally on the right track. I am using Regia Stretch in really fun Crayola colors-I like to think of it as the SARK rainbow. Although it's been frustrating, figuring out how to do this is a nice change from some of my less challenging projects. Some of my WIP-a lavender cotton moss-stitch tunic for my 20-month-old daughter, Alice; a variegated blue-green scarf in a slubby cotton/silk for my 2-month-old son, Teddy (to match his sisters' scarves), a patchwork cotton blanket for said little man (just needing many, many ends darned in), and a bubblegum-pink perhaps bag using two strands of crochet thread. I have a bunch of projects lined up, too, but I am exercising my self-discipline by not starting them until the donkey-work is done.

Went to Krispy Kreme this morning and shared the extras with my neighbor. I take it as a reassuring sign that my 4-year-old, Isabel, didn't lose her mind when I explained where the rest of the donuts disappeared to. (By the way, that's all the kids-just the three of them.)

Sunday, September 08, 2002

Okay. So the new little extras are finally up and I've proved I can follow directions blindly. As my darling Pikaman says, "Have faith in the universe." Now will someone please tell me how to do all the cool stuff on the sidebars? I want little icons that say how I'm feeling and those awesome buttons to other knitting girls and I especially want to be on the Knitting Blog Ring. I want to hang out with those girls. Socks still not going well-I may have to euthanize them to put them out of their misery.

I am having a little trouble getting this whole blogging thing started. I am such a Luddite, but here I am staring at lines of code! Also, I just had to start from scratch on this sock I am knitting. ( what is this? my ninth try?) I was nearly to the ankle. I am Sock Impaired. Sock Dyslexic. I need a Sock Support Group...no, scratch that, better make it Sock Meds for my Post-Traumatic Sock Disorder. I am trying to add comments, so someone can see my problems getting started and HELP ME, but it could take a while.

Hello! My first posting! I have been addicted to knitting blogs for the past two weeks and wanted to say so much! I don't know whether I would love it or hate it if no one came, but it's MY party now!